hey sorry for not replying i didnt want to
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this study period has made me even more hermit than before. i’m not exactly amazed at the fact that i can stay indoors (be it my house / hostel room or block level) for as long as possible.
many things definitely happened during this semester and things were tough and rough. nothing was easy. literally nothing. and here i thought, strongly believed, the even numbered years would be relatively better than the odd numbered ones. that mere simple and basis-less belief had made me hang on and look forward to life and to the future even tho only 1% of me felt optimistic about it. i don’t even know what to believe in anymore. everything got messed up and i’m stuck in this mess that’s entangled with a lot of other related non-related issues.
that naive gullible 1% of me came up with an explanation that this is an anomaly. this year has been an anomaly among the 22 years of my life like how there are always anomalous results in every experiments we conduct (properly ahem without cheating and the factor of time constraint).
or maybe, just maybe, there is nothing to think and believe about. maybe i’m just overthinking, as usual. or maybe, i need something to believe in, something to hold me up and support, something for me to keep my faith and keep on going.
but honestly, my world, ideologies, beliefs, basically everything, has been crumbling and i’ve no idea how much more is left to be destroyed.
one thing felt great throughout this period tho. blogging and writing (a little) made me feel a tad bit better. maybe this little hermit crab has no one to talk to after shutting everyone out and hiding in her little bubble with no doors.
it’s great to change an avenue for me to write about some things / thoughts. maybe the future posts that will be reposted wil eventually hide this text post but that’s one of the good things. you’ve got to look for it to read it. or maybe, it wont even be read by anyone. doesn’t really affect me.
in the meantime, my asian blood and competitiveness and elitism (claimed by others) are what keeps me from giving up on studying for finals. so, all the best for those who are having their finals too! and for those who dont, all the best for life?
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i’ll always miss you.
is it miss analog too much ugh gross help
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqf8mu2BIovInJqr69AovD-MnsbX66qqVEj6Fo0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1e565o2uhsd2l
ded at the tags but hope she can get her cardholder back sigh
https://www.instagram.com/p/BqbH1Skhe8PtP_mzX-LtbSGa3MH4qhRWK4dCfs0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1mvmogae415ba
blessed: daddy offered to send me to hostel today –> i drove –> started pouring heavily –> aka slow like a frickin snail –> longer time needed to reach the ulu destination –> daddy most prolly be late for work.
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BUT, he offered to carry my stuff up even tho he’s running late (’: much love 💕 (at Tampines St 22)
https://www.instagram.com/p/BqbHvEZhA8SHMwgTzGYDKKahvebsywGmSApuPM0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=p6wwlb0ch5h9




